DAWN OF THE DUMB
Shazza's hungover and ready for a fight with anyone, even Vickney. Teen persuades Denman to take her to see a romantic movie. Shazz scoffs about Denman's inability to keep awake for anything that doesn't have Vin Diesel smashing up at least four cars and shouting a lot. Denman scowls prettily. Teen looks like somebody's messing with her favourite Ken doll.

Backstreet's all: "Slutty Slutty Slutty...shall I do Slutty's laundry? Where's Slutty? Is she coming back soon?" until Fool screams "Enough!" Backstreet: sad. Fool: sadder. Ethel 2.0 has a "thoughtful" expression. Or it could be trapped wind.

MMartin finds out from Poline that Moomin is out shopping with Glenn Betty Boiler. His "aaaaagh" expression is quite funny, but I don't see Betty anywhere. Glenn and Moomin return from Up West, laden with shopping bags, and nobody asks to see what they have bought. These producers live on Planet NoShopping, don't they? And anyway, isn't Moomin supposed to be learning how to be a nurse and not skiving off to shop with weird stalker women? Glenn manages to invite herself to dinner, and Moomin presents MMartin with a new mobile. Glenn says something like: "Now you can keep in touch with your Own True Love - ie me and not Fat Bird over there". Moomin's moomin sense is still not working. Must be Glenn's hair blocking the vibrations or something.

BB has a suit on. He gets a package to deliver in Byrite's Merc. On the way to the car park he bumps into the Truant Twinz. I think one of them calls him "Sambo" - where are these kids from? Eltham? There's some nonsense with the package, and BB discovers that he's trafficking DROOCKS! What did he think he was doing? Kidney transplants? BB goes back to Byrite and tells him to stick his evil kiddy-killing job and Byrite offers him a job as ninja kitten trainer or something. Meanwhile Yolande is trying to persuade TriniDad to let BB work in the shop. TriniDad says that BB is a no-good drug peddling Juhneen-shagger who shouldn't be allowed near a chiller cabinet. BB overhears and decides that training kittens for Byrite might be a bit more fun than being cannon fodder in the Kwik-E-Mart.

The Truant Twinz show an unhealthily comprehensive knowledge of the film Poltergeist for ones so young and spread Mickney's hair gel all over AGarry's living room. AGarry is spooked. As is Billy. Now, that wasn't exactly hard, was it, kiddies?

Denman "has it out" with Shazz. Shazz asks if Teen makes him happy. Denman replies: "Well, I'm happier than you, Mrs Hangover. Get over yourself, will you?" Shazz wobbles her chin in despair, and then she starts checking the punters for wedding rings. One bloke is not only ringless, but looks a bit like Colin Farrell's older brother, and he's in the mood for cheezy chat-ups with orange women. Denman spies Shazz flicking her hair at Colin across the bar and tries not to grrr too loudly.