'TIS PITY SHE'S A WATTS II
While O-Den seethes, Denman and Shazza are upstairs at Weird Family Central, kissing tenderly, and gently, teasingly unfastening each other's shirt buttons in the evening half-light...damn and blast you all to hell EE Producers! What were you thinking of? Cutting away to O-Den marching across the square just when a hungry nation was about to get a glimpse of Denman chest? Bastards.

O-Den asks Vickney if it's true. Vickney sobs. Den tells her to pack her bags and get ready to return to WFC. Poline looks like she wants to recite a cautionary poem about shagging one's sister too near a chocolate fountain, but restrains herself and mutters: "you'll be back...doobedee doo"

The counterpoint to all this is a long and slightly dull two-hander between Juley and MY Gus. MY Gus thinks Juley's on droocks, but Juley reveals that he's been watching too many 50 Cent videos, and wants the car, the girls, the Docklands flat (are you sure?). MY Gus warns him not to become a gangsta because he'll be crap at it, and end up dead, with a girl's name too. Juley calls MY Gus a losa. MyGus: Sad. And Angry. This had better be going somewhere.

Anyway, back to O-Den. He has a "quiet chat" with Shazza, who greets him wearing nothing but Denman's shirt. Denman, unfortunately, puts on a sweater and storms out to harangue Vickney on Loser's Bench. Shazza's lip twitches a lot and she does that strange deadpan voice thing that doesn't really work. Anyway, she points out that a) they're not related, so it's not sick/wrong; and b) she's not Den's little girl any more, she's Denman's Red Hot Mama, and there's nothing anybody can do about it.

O-Den tries to remind her that a) she's still his daughter, therefore it is still sick and wrong; b) he is but the latest in a long line of violent psychos, which was only broken by Hero Fireman Tom, who died anyway. Shazza's having none of it. I got bored at this point and the baby needed bathing, but somehow her defiance whittles away at Den's opposition. Maybe he got bored with all the lip quivering and hair twitching too.

Meanwhile, Byrite tries to recruit Denman into his merry band of Half-Assed Henchmen. The Half Assed Henchmen glare menacingly at Fool, just for laughs. Denman refuses politely and smiles at Dot, who is doing the Christian Thing and being nice to him while the rest of the pub shuns him. Just as Denman is about to order his second voddy, O-Den walks in. Pub falls silent. O-Den cracks a joke, and buys Denman a drink. Pub goggles, but nobody can be bothered really.