ANGIE'S GETS HER DEN BACK

O- Den is still in his Angel of Vengeance leather jacket when Shazza asks him to run the club for her because she wants it to be a "family business" - better order in more concrete wellies then. Meanwhile Squeaky is squeaking about giving all her money to Hitman and that was only after she shagged him to get a discount. All she has left is a wardrobe of black polonecks and slightly expensive suits, she wails. O-Den takes the gun back to Hitman - who turns out to be the wimpiest hitman ever and gives O-Den a refund. O-Den smacks Hitman's wrists for ripping off Squeaky, and it's back to the call centre for him. Squeaky gets her money back, and a job in the club - well we couldn't expect her to actually get off her Squeaky bum and go to a Job Centre, could we?

Denman is cross that O-Den is taking over the club - like he made such a good job of running it. He stomps around with tousled hair and smokes too much (lucky bugger). Eventually, he realises that Shazza is definitely not interested in any more freakish crypto incest-sex now that she can live out her Electra complex instead, and decides to move on. He slinks away during the Welcome O-Den party at the club, still scowling.

Meanwhile, the cute ginger cat with the evil face seems to have moved somehow from Chez Billy/Drippy to chez Slater. Billy doesn't like living with the Slaters in their Tardis House. O-Den winds him up about Grunt killing his best mate Roly. Oh the hilarity...

Fool and family return from their holiday in Glamorous Brighton. Ethel is worse than ever and Backstreet gets to practise his "concerned" look. Downstairs in the bar, Fool is bombarded with Tales of O-Den (mainly from the Bealemeister - who appears to be in ratfink heaven now that O-Den is back), and looks sad. He tries leaping over the bar O-Den-style, and falls over.

TriniDad is celebrating singledom with one long orgy of drinking, odd-sock wearing and yeahmanning. Bad Brutha is cross and clears up after him. Yolande is over at Dot and Jim's house, looking sad. She quotes a bit of TriniDad/Jim's letter and Dot says: "Ooooh that's Dylan Thomas that is!" Jim looks shifty, but Yolande agrees not to grass him up. Yolande confesses sadly to Dot that men don't usually hang around after the first couple of shags, and congratulates Dot for keeping Jim happy in the bedroom and elsewhere. Dot confesses that she and Jim haven't actually done it because they're old and English. Oh for god's sake, what is it with the EE scriptwriters' obsession with wrinkly sex, kinky sex or freakish crypto incest sex? Why can't EE characters just do plain, old fashioned shagging and be done with it? Yolande realises that she gave up a tropical paradise with free rum for this den of freakishness and books a flight home. I liked her too.

MMartin is actually working on the stall. Amazing. But no, he's pocketing the cash until Gay Pike lets him know that he's got his eye on him by going on about the books being down. Meanwhile Teen takes a break from sucking DJ Ross's face off to set Kellay up with MMartin. Shagging DJ Ross appears to have reduced Teen's braincell count - or she's sick of Kellay giving her lost puppy looks every time DJ Ross approaches. MMartin late for the date, and Kellay moans to a passing MY Gus. MMartin says: "Date? What date? As if I'd date a slapper like you!". MY Gus is shocked and appalled, and pushes MMartin in a girly fashion. Kellay runs off home. But the only thing she can hear at home are DJ Ross and Teen going at it like the clappers. Kellay's little face crumples and she cries. Poor Kellay! Shag MY Gus! He writes poems! He's sensitive! He wears silly hats! He needs something to get him out of the plot cupboard and away from the Deatheating Moomin!

MMartin goes home and raids the cashbox, only Poline catches him. Ruh-roh!