THE MARTYRDOM OF ST FOOL

This one carries on straight from the night before. Denman and Sham come out of the store room at the club adjusting their clothing. I guess Den is a bit of a “one minute man”. Sham is all “come round for dinner and keep me company on my birthday tomorrow!” etc etc but Denman is all “no, I don’t want to get into a serious relationship”. Sham: Doh! Fooled again! He goes off to meet Slutty at the pub and Sham goes home and is rude to Babs. She tells Babs that B can open her card from Gwant. It is from Rio and Gwant wants Babs to go and stay with him (cue Babs Windsor taking her lengthy break from the show). Babs also opens the bottle of nasty sparkling rose she had bought for Sham and drinks half of it, the greedy cow.

Fill and Kyert. Staring. Fill asks if Kyert recognises him and she says no. He doesn’t blow her cover and goes home. Kyert follows him home and starts wittering on about how she was really pleased to see him and still has Stockholm Syndrome etc. she is still an Underkover Kop. Fill chucks her out and tells Babs the whole truth about Kyert. Babs is sad.

Dot, Jim and Moomin talk for hours about the ID parade and Dot’s post traumatic stress syndrome type carrying on. Dot talks herself into going to the cops so she can stop another old lady from being mugged and losing her religion. Moomin is still sad about Jaymee and tells dot that he had crazy dreams about “cars what can talk to you”. Ha ha ha! Perhaps that was a distant memory of Knight Rider rather than an actual dream, Moomin.

Some filler type stuff happens with Baz and Juhneen.

Fool, Backstreet and Ethel 2.0 twitch nervously around the flat. Ethel is really fucking annoying. Slutty tries to work out what is going on. Fill tells Fool that Mad Frankie Knuckles is still going to have Backstreet lightly beaten. Fool bites his lips and looks nervous and then tells Backstreet that everything is going to be alright. They all go off to bed and Fool sits in the pub alone and in darkness but for the light from his halo. The three gay looking Mad Frankie sidekicks from last night show up and ask if he is Backstreet Moon. Fool says he is and they shout “bundle!” and jump him.