GOOD-FILL-AS

Oh well, I suppose it is time for the Annual Lame Eastenders Gangster Storyline. Backstreet is scared that Mad Frankie Knuckles (or whoever) is going to repossess his kneecaps and prepares to go on the lam. He steals some food and is about to make off with a bag of change from the takings when Fill catches him red handed and shouts at him. He threatens to evict the whole Familia Luna from the pub but Fool grovels on Backstreet's behalf. Backstreet tells the sad story of the duff 50 squid notes and Fool says he has the money to pay it back. It is his american holiday money but I don't think they let ex-cons into america anyway so who cares. Fill says that MFK will still beat up Backstreet so Fool says he will go instead. He explains to Fill how Backstreet is such a clueless muppet and for some reason this makes Fill think of Jaymee and come over all soft hearted.

Dot has to go on an ID parade and predictably doesn't want to. she shouts at Jim and Moomin and swears a bit ("bloody vicar"). Later Moomin comforts her and says she doesn't have to be afraid.

Dim Denman is talking to one of his dodgy mates in the Vic when he sees the wonder that is Sham and smirks seductively at her. sham flutters her eyelashes back. Slutty's fingernails grow about three inches and she goes and fusses round him. Later on Denman goes over to the club and continues to put his mack daddy moves on Sham. They end up snogging. Catfight!!!!

Baz and Juhneen meet up with Mr Stu Stu Studioline. Stu and Juhneen exchange evil smiles while Baz talks bollocks and tries to act like he isn't retarded. After Stu has gone it is revealed that Baz has spent the whole meeting drawing smily faces and £££ signs in his notepad.

Poline and Gay Pike find out that Martin is coming home from chokey on Friday.

Fill takes the money to Mad Frankie Knuckles gangsta hideout. MFK is played by Hywel Bennet. He says that Fill has gone soft and all his gay looking henchmen titter to themselves. He explains that he still has to teach Backstreet a lesson but because he returned the money it will only be a light punishment like an indian burn or a dead leg or something. As Fill is leaving a gangsta's moll comes in with drinks and -gasp!- it is Undercover Kyert! Her and Fill gawp at each other. Knowing her, the daft bint has married MFK by now.