MORONIC INFERNO
TriniDad decides to put a brave face on, and help Yolande and JoJo in the shop. At least, that's the DOOMED plan. A blonde copper appears on the doorstep and asks TriniDad to come with them to identify a body. JoJo is told to stop rearranging the magazines and bugger off. TriniDad gets cross and says that he's not going to stop running his shop just to identify every dead black person in a leather jacket in London. Eventually, he and Yolande shut up shop and get into the police car in front of the entire square, which happens to be out and about at 8am. Fool even manages to sell a frying pan and get a "topical" WMD joke in.

Drippy says that Billy has disappeared and trails around the square all day bleating: "Billeeeeee!" She drops CBF chez Slater, where Mo goes on about what will happen when she gets her hands on Billy. Shut up Mo. Teen: moans that all men are Scum and weeps. Shut up Teen. AGarry looks shifty, and Mo threatens to kiss him unless he tells her where Billy is. He tells them that Billy went to see Evil Rapist Graham. Drippy: cross.

Billy has spent the night feeding off spare Moomin powers at Jaymee's grave. He forgets that he used to kick the shit out of Jaymee on a regular basis, and goes on about how much he loved him. To be honest, I wasn't listening because I find this plotline tedious beyond belief. AGarry tells Billy that Drippy Knows, and Bill goes home. Big row. Nobody listens, then Billy admits that he hates Cute Baby Freddie (how could you? He's adorable!), and is starting to hate Drippy too. Oh dear.

Anyway, DI Everton goes with TriniDad to identify the body. TriniDad confirms it is Bad Brutha (boo!) and goes off to get drunk. In the pub everybody thinks that BB has been arrested, and O-Den tells TriniDad that BB had it coming. Yolande tells the pub that BB has been murdered, and everybody looks slightly embarrassed. Including the girls having a 21st birthday bash (in a pub at lunchtime? Are you sure?).

Meanwhile DI Everton and Wanamaker pay a visit to Byrite, who is out and about trying to find out who dug up BB's body. Byrite says he'll only answer questions in the comfort of his own living room. Quentin hasn't changed much since Sham moved out. How can these people live with someone else's decor? Anyway, Byrite denies everything, and DI Everton hints that the grass might have been a remorseful killer. Byrite looks worried. TriniDad sees the police leaving Byrite and demands to know why he isn't being arrested. Lots of screaming, lots of "dat was mah son!", and a promise that BB's ghost will haunt Byrite forevah. Byrite sniffs the air for the aroma of stale Benson's and leather. Curly and Lee look interested.

Oh, and Ian and PantoJane get Poline to look after the kids while they get it on in the living room. My eyes!