PERVY TALKY TALKY PERVY TALK
So, while our backs were turned, Dr Perv has rediscovered his vocation and sarongs and meditates in the morning. Cambodian cuisine seems to be agreeing with him, anyway. And Bad Brutha's going back to St Perv's Hospital with him? To do what?

Actually, everybody asks BB that question. Perhaps it'll be like Guys and Dolls and BB will win some local Cambodians' souls in a poker game or something. BB looks sad that nobody has any faith in his inability to do anything other than place a spread bet. Even the Dalai Perv has second thoughts, but only after he's met up with the Slaters, gone "ewww...mother and daughter? Who did I think I was? Alan Clark?", and tried not to ask Slutty about morning sickness. In the end, Dalai Perv tells BB that he doesn't have to travel to the other side of the world to do good. BB decides to stay and TriniDad is happy that he might start winning on the horses again if BB places his bets for him. Bye bye again Dr Perv. Please let him get eaten by mosquitos this time.

Poor old Dot gets it into her head that she has to raise £100 for Dalai Perv's mission and runs around the square, shaking her George V Jubilee tea caddy at all and sundry. Denman offers to smash the money out of reluctant punters (grr), but Dot instead prefers to extort extra cash out of anybody who wants a service wash. She's trying not to think about her hospital apppointment, but Denman keeps turning up and saying: "so when's this appointment then? Who's going with you? Are you scared? Shall I come...".

AGarry is cross with Minty because he nearly battered the door down after AGarry was late for work. He tells Minty that he's not going to commit suicide again. Instead he's going to drink beer and shag women, just like he used to, oh yes. Nothing wrong with him. Wibble.

Boy Detective Ian wants to know who Kyert's bedmate is, and tries to enlist ODen. ODen visits Kyert and calls her a daft bint for telling Ian anything because he's like a terrier - one of those yappy little buggers with topknots and bad attitudes - and will discover Kyert's shameful secret.

Denman goes to the hospital with Dot and pretends to read a magazine while she gets probed. The Specialist looks very familiar - I think he did a lot of childrens' TV in the 70s - and tells her that she's got a weird kidney, which means more tests. Dot keeps saying: "I haven't got cancer. I haven't got cancer". Specialist looks uncomfortable. Dot tells Denman and Denman does his sad look.