EXIT THE DRAGON

This is just going to be short as I was out watching the football and didn't get home til late. Anyway, nothing much actually happens. The DeathDragon Doomatron has collapsed and all of Walford has been covered in rubble.

Sullen is in a bad way and is instantly whisked off to hospital. Dot and Poline are trapped in the portakabin but are uninjured - Dot immediately sparks up and Poline rolls her eyes. Ian is trapped in scaffolding and, due to dramatic irony, ends up being looked after Candy Floss girl from last episode (her name turns out to be Jane). Backstreet is all trapped and mangled up but unfortunately is still conscious and able to talk. Slutty looks after him and is a total doll but then Backstreet tells her that Fool has done a bunk.

Everyone who has a speaking part rallies round and is helpful while lots of extras cry and gurn. Doktor Boden-shirt spots Sonia moping around and tells her to use her nursing skillz. Sonia is uncertain but then - - - all together now: MOOMIN POWERS ACTIVATE!!!! She knuckles down and starts looking after people. LadyDen hears eldritch whimpering from behind a fence - yes, it is devil twin boy who has been thrown clear. Denman rips the fence down with his bare hands (grrrr!) to rescue him. He seems to be OK. Billy gives his jacket to some shocked little boy but then loses track of him - it turns out to have loads of Byrite Crime Money in the pockets. Byrite is cross and has a total lack of conkernee-knees-up spirit of the blitz type good attitude. This may be important later. Some random extra melodramatically smears blood on Loser's Bench in the most hilarious shot of the episode.

Fool hears about the disaster-rama in a caff and rushes home, just in time for Backstreet to be cut free and have one of those wheel clamp things screwed to his head. Slutty gives Fool hacky looks as he accompanies Backstreet in an ambulance. Bealemeister also gets the wheelclamp treatment and dramatically clasps Jane's hand. Dot and poline predictably bicker and then bond. It is sweet and well acted and all but I can't be arsed to summarise it all. I have to get up really early tomorrow! A hunky fireman cuts a hole in the portakabin and the laydeez emerge to cheering crowds, thus restoring Poline's faith in humanity or something. They are wrapped in bacofoil and left to chill out on their ownsomes. Poline sits on Losers Bench and wipes the blood off Arfurs's name plaque with her metal blanket.

That's about it - I feel very let down after all the hype. Also England were robbed! I have got France in the work sweepstake though so all is not lost! Allez les Bleus, etc!