WORKING ON A SKUNK FARM
Lots of Park action today.

After last Friday's outburst from Poline, Dot resigned her post as manager of the beautiful launderette. This episode's task, should you accept it, is to watch Sonia, Jim and Poline cunningly manipulate Dot into thinking again. It's OK, it only took about ten minutes. Poline makes a picnic. Sonia tricks Dot into sitting with Poline and they duke it out, with chains and mud and namchucks and everything. Dot, exhausted and crusted with mud and unspeakable substances found only in inner city parks - is finally pulled down by her spandex halterneck into a half-Nelson and forced by Ninja Poline to take her old job back.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the park, AGarry is telling Simpleton about his troubled childhood. AGarry's dad cleared off when he was but a nipper (god, he must have been a super-annoying child), and he doesn't want this to happen to the Simplet. Simpleton is troubled. She also secretly wants AGarry to move out because he's annoying her with his blokey ways and smelly socks.

Back in the square. Dr Leroy (for it is he, the new doctor), has a go at Fill about security. Not being Fill and being middle-class, Dr Leroy doesn't think that adequate security is sleeping with a baseball bat and a freshly-loaded pistol in Ukyert's knicker drawer, and wants better locks to protect his collection of rugby shirts and unflattering female undergarments. Fill changes the locks without telling Dr Leroy, who knocks the door down, and Minty into the bargain. Fill says: "You did that deliberate, like! Thass assault that is!" So once again the posh bloke is thwarted by twisted Cockernee cunning. There's some nonsense about the pub flat door being left open - like it hasn't been open for over 20 years Fill - and this makes Fill crosser. I predict more shouting at old ladies...

Reefer madness sub-plot 1: Mafia Martin and Asif gloat over their extremely fast-growing plants that look set to yield about half a joint's worth of produce. Neat Potatoes Man creeps over to the shed and spies on them. Ruh roh!

The Slaters decide to show Sullen a good old-fashioned Slater night out to cheer her up. So, that's a couple of vodkas in the pub, a quick piss-take of Posh's latest wig, a "thoughtful" monologue about love and truth over a curry followed by the airing of a long-held sordid family secret at midnight. Sounds like just what Sullen needs. Off they go to the club, where AGarry is chatting up an unknown woman. Sullen is scathing. AGarry is sad.

Billy is worried about the auditor's visit and tries to think up all kinds of scams to get the money. Several yawnsome attempts that are too boring to chronicle later, he creeps into the empty club wearing a Zorro mask and a big stripey sweater, destroys the video camera, and beats himself up with a baseball bat. Then he calls to police to say: "I'VE BEEN ROBBED"

NB: some of the above isn't quite what was shown on TV - see if you can spot the deliberate mistake, readers...