THIS AIN'T NO NIGHTCLUB

Now, you're a copper who gives it all up to be with the thug that you love. The relationship has had a rocky patch or two in the past couple of weeks, but you've moved in with him, and things are going OK - though the thug's nanny keeps giving you hacky looks. Suddenly, he ups and goes to Rio, leaving you on your own. Do you:

a) Concentrate on rebuilding your life, looking for a new job, cleaning the house etc.

b) Look up an old boyfriend you met by chance a few days before, get drunk, snog him and invite him to spend the night (on the sofa, mind)

Well, this is the EEverse, where Fill is attractive and Dim Denman is a winner, so of course, you choose b).

Psycho Nanny spends most of the ep hiding behind hedges and smirking, and hiding Fill's surprise return at 1pm from Kyert. Dim Denman keeps turning up when least wanted and making sheeps eyes at Kyert. What is the point of this character again? Isn't he supposed to be attractive to women, and not some whiny co-dependent stalker type who needs constant validation? So, he's in the toilet when Fill returns, sees Kyert in her dressing gown, and assumes that Kyert, of course, has been doing the nasty with Denman. It's King Edward time!

Vickney makes a cooked breakfast for everyone, but Shazza's busy and Denman isn't there. This gives her an excuse to sulk all day. Scalliq and DJ Ross invite her out to "check out some clubs" (during the day??), but they end up pumpin' choons in Angie's Den instead and not putting the drinks order away. Shazza is cross.

Martin has a visit from his parole officer. There's lots of boring nonsense about whether or not he should go back to the stall, but he says he can't cope. Now, hang on, he can swagger through the market in a blackmailed jacket, go to the pub and generally hassle nice young Asian stallholders, but his own mother doesn't think he can go back on the stall. Anyway, he demands more nasty jackets from Teen Ferreira so that he can sell them to Asif's friends. She runs off crying and the parole officer sees it all.

Fool has dates coming out of his ears. Slutty is starting to look slightly jealous. Oh shag him, for god's sake woman.

AGarry gets to feel Baby Simpleton kicking. He goes into shock for the rest of the episode, and badgers Rickay about babies and fatherhood and shit.