THE PARABLE OF THE STRAY CAT AND THE PIZZA

by Mark
It turns out that Gay Pike spent the night in his car after Poline threw him out. He spends the day trying to sort out somewhere to live and poignantly pressing his nose up against the window of the laundrette. Poline defrosts her freezer, but can anything defrost her cold, cold heart? Pike is just about to drive away when Mark throws himself in front of the car. Brake Pike! Brake! He tells Pike that he has to stay and look after Poline. Pike says he is sick of the Fowlers acting like annoying soap opera characters and not talking sense. Mark admits that he is dying and eventually Pike goes back to Poline’s and she forgives him.

Nita gets a letter from her family asking her to move back to India.

Moomin is sick of Doris hanging around and tells Jim to get rid of her using a complicated parable about cats. Jim tells Doris a complicated parable about pizza but she doesn’t seem to understand and goes out and buys loads of pizza. Dot rings and says she is coming back soon.

Simpleton and Sullen spend all day in the caff trying to out-shrew each other. Sullen takes an extra long lunch and comes back drunk. Simpleton tells her to wind her neck in or look for another job.

Baz runs around making doomed-to-failure Valentines day plans, including buying loads of roses and taking all the petals off to strew around or something. Roy nearly catches Natalie and Rickay at it in a broken car at the Arches.