ASK YOURSELF: WHAT WOULD FILL DO?
Charlie hasn't come home, and the Slater women are worried. He's a cabbie, girls. Cabbies sometimes stay out all night, doing...you know...driving and stuff. Anyway, we get a shot of his empty cab with the Hammers sticker in the window all broken. Oh dear, what has happened?

Sullen's eight million times more miserable than usual because she's got morning sickness. Ginger tea and dry toast, love. And I wish Drippy would sit up straight. Charlie returns home with slightly reddened knuckles and admits that he has spent the night cleansing the streets of Graham. All the Slaters except Drippy voice their approval. Drippy just squeals something about it being her fault that violence is committed in her name and scuttles off. Charlie agrees and says he feels dirty. The Slaters are nonplussed.

Meanwhile, Teen is moping about, trying to get back into Kellay's good books. Kellay, though, isn't interested, and finds a strange, greasy young man wearing a horrid purple suit to cop off with to prove to Teen that she is no longer a lesbotic. Teen is sad, but cheers up when Slutty tells her that being raped by Boon was something she could cope with because she had nothing to lose and no further down to go. Drippy, apparently, has something to lose - called Billy. Yeah, I couldn't work that one out either.

Billy is moping down at Sham's. Sham has her brown pinstriped Godmother Gangsta suit on today, and kindly advises Billy to ask himself: "What would Fill do?" whenever he's in trouble. Billy points out sensibly that he isn't a spud-headed psycho and Sham looks put out. She goes off to discuss re-covering the snooker tables with a sleazy bloke who wants to charge her a grand per table. She pouts and shuffles, then accepts, then whines about how nobody takes her seriously. I'm not bloody surprised with that kind of business practice, madam. Sheesh! There are other snooker table coverers in London you know.

Adull has to go to the wholesalers but nobody will cover him on the stall except Scalliq. DJ Ross flounces off to buy more records, and Scalliq sells a nasty skirt/top combination for full price to Vickney to prove what a great salesman he is. Adull has no choice because the rest of the family are being arses as usual. Scalliq looks after the stall, until DJ Ross comes back and shouts at him. I can't help but notice that DJ Ross seems to get through an entire jar of Stu Stu StudioLine Concrete-setting hair gel every day. Scalliq is sad. Mickey Finhead tells him to give up trying to get in with the Ferreira Scooby gang, and Scalliq says: "but I told you, Dadvis is not my Dadvis". Sooo...the only other explanation is that you want to make DJ Ross your wife, is it, Scalliq?

Nat gets a call from the Procurator Fiscal, who tells her to ditch the Girl Detective Leather Jacket: there's nothing suspicious about Bazza's death and she should give it up and move on to the next sweaty loser. She decides to plant a shrub in honour of Barry (a rhodedendron, perhaps? Big, ugly, fleshy and a total bloody nuisance), and reluctantly asks Juhneen if she wants to join her. Juhneen says she can't cope with any more grief - Nat gives her a hacky look and stomps out. Juhneen whines to Idiot Sidekick Rickay about how everybody expects her to be more grieving when they don't know what it's like to have that fat loser cluttering up the mantlepiece and ex-wives giving her hacky looks...

Kyert has got the decorators in to repair the damage done by the Big Girls Gang, and Shazza helps her by getting her printer to design and print some Klassy Kyert Offer leaflets within about ten minutes - who is Shazza's Miracle-Working Printer and can I get the number? Sham does her best to thwart Kyert's business ambitions by banning Kyert's leaflets from the caff and the bar, but Kyert's offer of free Plum Passion nail varnish does the trick with the rest of Walford's women, and people come flocking for miles to get their nails done in one afternoon. Shazza offers to invest in Kyert's expansion plans - you can tell Kyert's a true professional because her business plan is actually written in biro on a piece of lined A4 paper rather than the back of a fag packet like most EE plans. Sham pouts and whines to Araminta, who offers to get violent. Yeah, that's a really sound idea, Mints. You've been lifted at least once already, and now you want to mess up an ex-copper's life. Do the words "Death Wish" have any meaning to you? Sham gives him the nod, and Araminta takes his trusty sledgehammer to Kyert's mirrors.

Back to the Drippy plot (if we must). Drippy spends most of the day slouching on the Swings of Contemplation (painted in Palace colours, for some reason), and then Billy comes along to tell her not to be too hard on Charlie because...because...oh I'm bored now. And straighten your bloody back, woman! Anyway, Drippy goes home, forgives Charlie and they all have yet another fish supper to celebrate the Cleansing of Graham. But then the police come in and arrest Charlie for assaulting Graham because abducting people in your cab and beating them up is...like...you know...illegal?