THE YEAR OF THE KAT
MMartin looks for jobs and applies himself to selling fruit and vegetables. He apologises again to Sonia for being insensitive on Jaymee's birthday and says that he is going to get a proper job and change for her. Sonia says that he has to change for himself, mmmkay. Wow, who can argue with Mighty Moomin Wisdom?

Dadvis makes reptilian faces and calls a family summit to discuss Ash's gambling problem. All the kids are doubtful. He take Shirley out for a drink and they witter on about birthdays and kids etc. zzz. Meanwhile Scalliq is longing for DJ Ross and says he was only selling drugs to buy new DJ wheels of steel. He gives DJ Ross the money he nicked on Friday and tells DJR to buy a new Cross Fader Dominator or whatever.

Sullen calls A-Garrry and asks him to come round so they can divide up their stuff. They bicker and then end up shagging each other. Sullen still chucks him out afterwards. Meanwhile, Simpleton taks to Pat about how Garry asked to marry her last week. Pat's hair looks really wierd. She says that Simpleton could do worse, especially seeing as how she is a frog-faced, single mum. Simpleton looks thoughtful. When A-Garry gets home after shagging Sullen, Simpleton is waiting for him in bed in a saucy black nightie. Aiiieee! My eyes!!

Drippy simpers around the Vic and watches Fool and Slutty non-flirting with each other. Fool offers her a barmaid job and Drippy acts really shocked like he has asked her to go on the game or something. She goes to Kyert's Klassy Klawitorium, gets a free manicure and watches Kyert boss Sham around. The shop is very purple. Kyert says that if she can "run her own business" (which Fill gave to her after she gave up her proper job. Shut up, Kyert) then Drippy can be a barmaid. Drippy accepts the job and messes up at first but then likes it when a drinker flirts with her. Meanwhile Fool gives a big speech to celebrate Slutty's last day at work and the fabulous year of tortured relationship drama they have shared. Fool and Backstreet have to take Ethel 2.0 to hospital to get a spigot fitted to her skull. Ethel puts a brave face on it so as not to worry the boys. When the lads get back, Slutty asks Fool to read something at her wedding. Fool says he can't go as he has to defrost all the sausage rolls and also would like to keep his kneecaps for later use. Slutty stomps off and cries as she walks home. Fool laughs hysterically and bangs his head against the bar. Only joking, he looks sad. Maybe he is thinking about West Ham's performance at the weekend. Dude, they were winning 3-0!!!!