Check out Sarah and her fancypant pictures!

A Vulcan looking lady shows up looking for Fool Moon and tracks him down to the Vic. It turns out she is his probation officer and he has missed some appointments. Fool turns on the "charm" and explains it is because he has a job. He doesn't want any of the others to know he is a crim so when Babs asks what they are talking about he says that Ms Vulcan is his ex girlfriend and snogs her. Vulcan gets into the spirit of things and slaps Fool Moon. she's a feisty one! Like every other law enforcement in the Greater London area, Vulcan lady instantly recognises Mo.

Jaymee and Lady Copper tell Moomin to stop obsessing about Fill and to get on with her life.

The Slaters continue to mock Slutty for not having a date for the anniversary meal. Sullen mocks Slutty in the caff where Dr Perv lurks in the background smirking pervily. Later on Sullen accidentally knocks a bag of chips onto Dr Perv covering him with ketchup and they go back to the house to clean him up. Dr Perv helps cook the anniversary dinner and they flirt subtly (a process which involves Dr P spraying whipped cream onto Slutty's breasts)

Fill is in a bad mood and threatens to slap Annoying Gary repeatedly. There is no work at the arches because no-one wants a moiderer tinkering with their Ford Fiesta. (does Fill still own the 'elf club, btw?). Fill locks up early but AGary's anniversary gift to Sullen is still inside. Gasp!

Ian sees Simpleton talking nicely to the twins (who have miraculously reappeared after being AWOL for 6 months) and then wanders round muttering darkly into his mobile phone. Simpleton whines that he left her on her own at the chippy all day and then Ian says he realised that they are a proper family and he is looking forward to a new baby. It turns out he has been planning some sort of "getting knocked up" party for Simpleton -hmmm, I bet it will all end in tears.

AGary is late for the dinner because he is begging Fill to open the Arches to get his present. Dr Perv stays for dinner and Babs shows up wearing a hellacious gold jacket (Go, Disco Babs!). It is all awkward until AGary explains he braved the Wrath of Fill to get the present which is a chunky engraved necklace thing. Then they are all happy and have a nice dinner. Mo has got some oysters off the back of a lorry for them to eat. Eww. Charlie and Babs have a drink and maybe kiss. Eww. Dr Perv and Slutty sit on Losers Bench and continue to flirt. In the end Dr Perv can't hold off any longer and sticks his tongue down Slutty's throat. Eww, Eww and thrice ewww.