DOT VERSUS GOD

For some reason, Simpleton won’t be able to get any money out of Ian (which sounds like a crock of shit, but what-ev-uh) however Fill still says he’ll pay for her D.I.V.O.R.C.E. Simpleton and Pat think they have a catering contract all sewn up and get Fill to buy them a van to purvey their manky sandwiches around London, however Ian spies on them and undercuts the contract. Also Sham waves her tits around a bit and Ian pulls the string in her back which makes her say one of her 5 Business Barbie catchphrases. This is enough to convince the client to go Bealemeister.

Backstreet sells his tinned food to a pig farm and then skips around like he is Donald Trump or something.

Vickney and Shazza argue boringly and then decide to take in Den Jr when he is let out of the slammer.

Juh-neeen’s evil plots all come crashing down when Bazzer runs into Nat on the street and finds out that Juhneen didn’t give him the message about arranging access to Jack. He gives her the benefit of the doubt but still chucks her out of the house. Grr, foiled again!

Bad Brutha contemplates going on the lam to stop the Social taking the baybay away. Dr Perv advises him not to do it but Bad bro is all “brother don’t preach! I’m keeping my baby!” In the end he stays though and the social workers take the annoying plot device away. Perhaps him and Moomin can form a support group or something.

Dot vs God part XXXXVVVIIII: All of Walford mobilise to get Dot to church. Dot thinks she has lost her special bible and has conniption fits until Jim sees that it is lying on the floor, like really obviously visible. Dot prays in church and is once again confronted by God’s Silence blah blah blah. She runs outside and twitches existentially while Moomin and Jim shout “Dot! Dot!”