ARE YOU GONNA BE MY BIRD?
Very quick and dirty crib for the week before last. Sorry all!

1. BABYGATE
Dr Foxy is turning into Dr Queen Wolf, but at least she's getting down with her bad self and not whining about ovaries any more. GADawn still thinks she can win Slimy back with her functional fallopian tubes, and demands large sums of money, plus expenses for carrying the embryonic Dawncub to full term. Slimy gets her to sign a contract that promises to carry the baby to full term, and hand him over without any arguments. Then he sends Dr Foxy over with the money. GADawn: sad, but not noticeably pregnant yet. Keef somehow realises that she's preggers - using unheard-of sonar skills that he learned off the Discovery Channel, perhaps - and offers fatherly support.

2. STACEYGATE
Not Yet Text Pest BroJo's back from his holidays sans Davetta, who by now is obviously tango-ing her little heart out in some Argentine bordello. He suspects that JoJo's got something unsavoury going on and starts hitting any male who gets within kissing distance. JoJo carries on with Dadley. A nation is mystified but slightly creeped out by BroJo's brotherly protectiveness.

3. STELLAGATE
Think you've got the idea now. Stella/Sophie Thompson is still competing with a ten year old boy for Fill's attention, and doesn't appear to think this is a bad thing. Anyway, she also gets mildly jealous that Fill has found a properly dodgy replacement for Dodgy Marcus. Stunt Marcus is responsible for getting Moomin freed on bail. Fill asks Stella to move in above the pub permanently. Maybe he's going to offer free conveyancing with every ten pints or something.

4. ATKINSGATE
First PB Bert, now Deano gets his own plot...what is the world coming to? Deano is depressed because Atkins is in town. Chelski offers to help him on the stall, and he makes a move on her. Chelski knocks him back. Deano: sadder yet suddenly less pointless.

5. MOOMINGATE
Stunt Marcus (temp nickname) gets Moomin freed on bail, but MMartin still won't let her poison Chloebecca with her Dirty Jackson ways. He tells Moomin that they can't bury Poline until the post-mortem is complete, and that's the only reason why she's not in Bad Girls yet. Moomin decides to make a break for it, and Fill hides her from the police when they come to arrest her for MOIDER! Before she goes, Moomin persuades Panto Jane to let her see Chloebecca one last time while everybody's pretending to be sad at Poline's memorial service, and then activates her Moomin powers to disappear the two of them into a taxi right under MMartin's nose. MMartin: cross.